October 30, 2020 – Friday (Covid-19 is worst yet at >1000 deaths/day and 90K new cases per day, over 9 million cases and nearly 230,000 deaths to date in US alone and still no federal plan … neighbor Jo’s 90th … non-Halloween is tomorrow … I still have only one working eyeball and there are now only 4 days until the election of our lifetime.)
I’m contemplating buying stock in Rolaids (parent company Sanofi – a French pharmaceutical company based in Paris). I was thinking I might just have to go check things out (after Covid as France is spiking like crazy) and then dug a little deeper and the company making this product is in Chattanooga. A walk along the Tennessee River just wouldn’t be the same as a walk along the Seine. Scrap that idea.
Anyway, at this date, antacids of any kind would be very welcome! I don’t trust the polls that say Biden is ahead … we’ve been here before and I’m having a bit of PTSD. I just want this election over. Trump’s ramped up his attacks on our democracy – openly cheating voters out of their votes/changing rules/messing with the USPS/lying every chance he gets about everything/you name it. It’s pathetic and disgusting. Yesterday he declared victory on Covid. Yesterday was the highest case and death rate we’ve had to date. He’s a lunatic and unfit for this office. And it’s appalling to me that the Republican party has let itself be desecrated by enabling this man, in every way – including not calling him out on his overt and blatant calls for violence specifically against Biden and Democratic leaders.
Where do I start??? I’ve been off my computer for 10 or so days. It feels like a lifetime. I had not realized how much I missed typing! I did, however, realize how much I hate texting and typing on my phone! Fred Flintstone fingers and auto-correct are not my friends! Computer, sweet computer – how I love thee!
All these days I’ve been thinking of what my next blog post would be … would it be “Magazine Junkie” (inspired by me looking sideways from my couch vantage point at my magazine rack with 17 mags waiting my perusal) … or an ode to all the errors in every single Hallmark movie I’ve watched this past week (and there were way tooooo many! Trees in full green foliage in the snow scenes! Cactus in a front yard in “Alaska”. Mountains that looked like the Dolomites in a scene of Denver! NO!!!! Details people, details!) … or would it have been a piece on being a “Creature of Habit – Rut or Routine”???? Or another tirade on our dying democracy and lack of decency by this president? Or simply one of gratitude for the out-pouring of friendship and concern and help I’ve experienced this week?
And so here I am … still not sure what’s coming forth … just glad to be sitting upright and typing on this laptop. Giddy almost!
After my cataract surgery (eyeball #1), “things” were great! Vision was clearing, the correction was amazingly crisp (my god, that tree has individual LEAVES!) and then 4 days later, the light show started and as beautiful and amazing as the neon lights were (and they were!) – I really don’t want to go through that again as it was the act of my retina detaching. NOT good. So, here I am another 10 days out having spent the last week lying on my puffy and oh-so-wrinkled face for much of those days (well, as much as I could). I was to be face down for 50 minutes every hour. Um, no – not possible. It took me 5 minutes to walk, face down, to the back door to let the dogs out (Bea and a guest)! But, I did the best I could.
And, after 10 minutes face down, my sinuses started going crazy and I’d get stuffed up. And then I couldn’t breathe. Breathing is good. Always good – even when it’s into your couch cushion. Ten minutes later my back would start to spasm. My old gymnastics injuries tend to rear their ugly heads when I’m face down. Let’s just say being face down is not the best position for me! So, I’d sit up and keep my face to the floor or prop myself up on my (now chaffed) elbows with my face facing my couch. (So glad I ordered that new couch! Was hoping it would absorb some fat cells though – but that didn’t happen!) Ten more minutes of being propped up and I started having muscle twinges in my neck. (Arnica gel – unscented – is great!). Ten minutes later I’d have ants in my pants! If I got up, I had to walk stooped over with my face to the ground (more back ache). Ha ha. I’m so out of shape even lying on my couch was a task! And so went my days! So, a week of being face down wasn’t the greatest (or easiest) but it certainly could have been worse.
Bea, my newly-found sweet, old lady chihuahua, has been my nursemaid. She must have had an ailing former owner because normally she doesn’t spend much time with me … not the best cuddler … and is found sleeping most of the day and throwing a baby lambchop around or eating the rest of the time. This past week she was glued to me! I had to wear an eye patch (a nice wenchy pirate look to go with the Einstein hairdo) and was glad for it as she licked it constantly! If nothing else, she has been a lovely little companion and made me laugh with her antics.
The retinal light show resulted in that left eye’s vision as looking through pond scum water. It was amazingly gross and I’m sure there was a tadpole in there somewhere! I could see at the top and left sides of my vision. Nothing more. So, emergency surgery was scheduled but by the time I got there, the blob had gone past my center line of vision and now required a different procedure – one that I’d have to come back for – the next day.
Living on an island has its challenges when something like this arises and you need assistance OFF island (and can’t drive yourself). I put out an APB to my friends/neighbors/dog parents and had a multitude of help in minutes! It was extremely humbling and I am so very, very thankful and grateful to all of them for their kindness and help in my time of great need.
Surgery was … painful. I do not do well with medical things. I’m the Queen of the 1% of oddities and weirdnesses that textbooks talk about. Who has ever had a mastoid? Me! Who has had osteomyelitis? Me – again! Who shattered a wrist/dislocated an elbow and shoulder/herniated discs and messed up her knees in one fall? Yo! Who was in labor for days and then needed an emergency C-section? Yours truly. Who had complications during pregnancy that no one had seen before/resulting in a lost baby? Um – me. Who had another C-section – this time without anesthetic? Yeah … that would be me, again. So, when I asked the surgeon if I should be feeling what I was feeling during the procedure and he asked, “You can feel that?” … I wasn’t surprised. Being that it was near Halloween I kept thinking that my eyeballs were like mozzarella balls with slices of green olives on them being skewered for party nibbles. Not so great. But they took care of it – eventually. I was secretly hoping they’d yank out my tonsils at the same time as I’ve wanted them out for years but don’t dare do a voluntary surgery knowing my history! This was voluntary enough!
Anyway – it all ended up fine with me face down on the couch for a week. And, after yesterday’s post-op, with the doctor saying everything was going along as it should and I didn’t have to be face down anymore but to lay low and blah blah blah … here I am. No trampoline jumping, no flight travel, no mountain climbing and no lying on my back. So, no overturned turtle impressions for awhile. I think I can handle that! There is a gas bubble holding the retina in place and as that dissipates/gets absorbed and normal eye fluid replaces it … (it makes me squeamish just to write this!) … the vision will increase. It might take 6-12 months for it to be fully “ok” … it’s now just a matter of time and hopefully things will progress every day. But, what I can see now (that upper 1/3rd of vision) is crisp and clear and fabulous. So, I am thrilled. And, that also means cataract surgery/eyeball #2 can be done – once I get the go-ahead – hopefully before the end of the year.
I am still a one-eyed wonder … as I have to patch this left eye or I’ll fall over as the sight/bubble thing is too weird/wiggly for even this brain to sort out and manage. But, it’s okay. I’m not going anywhere … just laying low for a few weeks until I (hopefully) get the all-clear before TG.
And, yeah, this might happen again with the other eye … but it might happen next week or never, too.
So, here I am … thinking about the things that I was thinking about when I was face down and clogged up … and aside from how much I love magazines and flipping through them and looking at the pretty pictures and reading what someone else has written … and how much I love routine and that I’m really a routine kind of gal and when I’m out of said “rut”, I’m kind of off-kilter more than I like (glad to be back to a better semblance of normalcy!) … and how much I need more exercise/stretching in my life … as well as music … I (again) realized how very fortunate I am in my life, friendships and loved ones. Near and far.
In the blink of an eye – literally – my world changed from independence to being reliant. I’m not good with that! But, a few emails later I had rides and time spent (some days were up to 10 hours long), pizza, soup, groceries, a latte, a candle, muffins, nuts, canned pears, offers to help with whatever and well wishes by the armloads.
I know that whatever comes my way … or comes our way as in the outcome of this election looming before us and what will be going on the days after … ALL WILL BE OKAY. If anyone needs help – you call me! We will weather whatever and friends help friends. It’s a wonderful thing. Thank you my friends.
I am very grateful.