Wouldn’t hurt a fly …

October 20, 2021 … Wednesday (gray, wet, and blustery up on this NW island)

I watched Annie (my old lab) watching a fly the other day that was buzzing around her. She’s slow and lumbering and I was chuckling to myself that she didn’t have a chance in hell in getting that fly – until she did! I watched her snap and gobble. One chomp and that fly was history. Good girl!

I hate flies. Despise flies. There might be some good use for them but I can’t think of one. They’re icky, annoying, dirty, buzzy and when you squish them, their guts are just plain disgusting! So gross! So, one less fly, who am I to complain?

It made me think, though, that while I consider myself a very gentle person … would I hurt a fly? No – not consciously … but, yeah, I’d smash the living daylights out of one! I’d do it so quickly – he or she wouldn’t feel a thing! Here one minute/gone the next! No hurting involved!

I think back to when I was a kid … my brother was always running around with a butterfly net, nabbing some unsuspecting butterfly or moth or insecta minutiae out of the sky. I wonder how many hundreds of insects he wiped off the planet? Of course, we didn’t know about ecology and saving species, etc etc at the time … but my apologies to all those Monarchs, Tiger Swallowtails, Morning Glories, Japanese beetles and fireflies that ended up dying on an alcohol soaked cotton ball at the bottom of a jar … ending up on a cotton batting/mounted in a wall frame. Kind of gross to think about having dead insects framed in your home. Especially ones that you murdered yourself. But, it’s what was done.

Anyway – I digress. I am as guilty. How many flies and June bugs have I swatted or drowned? How many spiders (even though not “really” insects) have I smashed to smithereens? I hate to guess – but thousands, I’d imagine.

But how many others have I saved? I feed honey water to the fat bumblebees in early spring when they are all but goners … or how about the ones I’ve scooped out of the dog water bowl?

If I have a moth in the house – I capture it and release it outside. There was a beautiful emerald green one this summer on my screen door … so itty bitty and absolutely perfect. Teeny tiny circles dotted it’s miniature wings. It was a beautiful little thing. I opened the door and blew gently on it until it flew away.

When I lived in Illinois I had an old gas pipeline removed from the den. The house was pristine when I moved in (can’t say the same for when I moved out) … and nary a bug or spec of dirt in the place. Except for that one Rhinoceros beetle! If you’ve never seen one, look it up. They are a good-sized (this one was about an inch long) with an armored body/exoskeleton and a horn (akin to a rhino’s) atop it’s head/snout. They are harmless but look really scary with their barbed and creepy legs! This particular Oryctes rhinoceros was living in said gas pipe and when the gas guy removed the pipe – out plopped this beetle! I scooped him up in a Tupperware container and took him outside to show my 3 year old neighbor and to afterwards deposit said bug in the park (well, actually, it was a cemetery but that story is for another day). But, before I could get him into the container, this little monster stood on his hind legs and waved his other four at me – begging for a fight! Egad, bud – chill out – I’m saving your life!

I can’t say the same thing about the June bug (many of millions that summer) who flew at me while I read out on the patio. I swatted it and it veered off somewhere … actually, drowning in my glass of iced tea. I didn’t know where it went until I picked up my glass for a sip sometime later. Needless to say – I went inside after that!

When in college I took an Entomology class (the branch of zoology focused on the study of insects). I loved it! It also didn’t hurt that I think I had a crush on the teacher and had a little background in it (all those killings as a child!). Sadly, the only thing I remember from that class is the latin/scientific name for bedbug … Cimex Lectularius. Weird.

While on our honeymoon in Hawaii, we were on an architectural tour of the city (I know – what geeks!). I remember standing on the grounds of the Iolani Palace of King Kamehameha and I looked down and on the top of my shoe sat a 4″ walking stick (Anisomorpha buprestoides … say that 3x fast!). I’d seen several in my lifetime and so didn’t panic, but continued on our tour with a 6-legged stow-away along for the ride and the rest of the tour group none the wiser.

I have a friend who has witnessed the return of the Monarchs in the south … millions of them. She “grows” them … getting little baby butterfly caterpillars and feeding them milkweed and keeping them safe as they grow and munch and eventually make their crysalises and fly the proverbial (and real) coop. She is a butterfly farmer of sorts and I admire her wherewithal and dedication to this endangered species.

As for me – I’ll rescue insects (some) and plant flowers for them to feed on – outside – but if they’re in my house – they are in MY domain and are, in all likelihood, goners!

My oldest friend (as in years I’ve known her not in age) had a chocolate lab years ago, Frango. A naughty, naughty dog but particularly endearing (if she wasn’t yours). In the summertime, she’d eat her fill of whatever insects she could gobble up but her favorites (possibly because they were so slow and big) were the cicadas. She’d eat dozens of them a day and by evening throw back up a huge pile of body parts and iridescent wings. I laugh every time I think of that … but I wasn’t the one picking this grossness up all the time!

There aren’t many insects up this way – except for spiders which Orkin takes care of for me and flies – which, apparently, Annie takes care of for me! So, is said … all good on the western front. At least, bug-wise!

Wishing you a lovely day … birds singing, bees buzzing (don’t kill them – we need them!) … and tonight when you go to bed I hope you sleep tight and don’t let the Cimices lectularia bite!

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